The
priest looked out of the altar, checking to see if the choir director was ready
to begin the hours before the Divine Liturgy. Just as he was ready to say,
«Blessed is our God,» his newest convert, Bill, made a grand entrance into the
church, having just gotten back from his latest pilgrimage to another
monastery. Bill—or Vasili, as he now insisted on being called—had been a normal
young evangelical convert, clean-cut, single, and working his first job out of
college. Then he discovered Orthodoxy in a bookstore, and with great zeal
embraced the Faith. He was chrismated after a usual six-month catechumenate,
during which he read just about every book in print on the Orthodox Faith.
After a
year or so, Bill had decided to go visit monasteries. This is where his change
began. He became more pious and more serious about his faith, but also started
to become, well, weird. Like this Sunday morning. Bill/Vasili was not content
to come in like everyone else. Rather, prayer ropes flying from his wrists, he
made grand bows at the entrance to the nave, and again, the entire congregation
watching, with a flourish prostrated before virtually every icon in the church.
It was such a display that no one listened to the hours.
Then,
just before the time the Liturgy should have begun, Bill came up to the door of
the altar and announced he must have confession, or he’d be in big trouble with
the holy elders. Father, being patient with zealous youths, went to hear the
confession.
«I am the
worst of all sinners!» Bill began as usual. Then he read his list, only four
pages this morning. «And I only could do two hundred prostrations, not my usual
three hundred, and only read four akathists, so I am not fully prepared for
communion,» he said. «Besides, I just had to have a cup of coffee, but since
everyone else does anyway, can I still go to communion?»
The
priest had heard it all before. What does one say? «You did all those prayers,
and still had to have a cup of coffee?»
«Well,
the Elder said I had to do the prayers, but I couldn’t stay awake to finish
them all. So I had some coffee. But doesn’t everyone in this jurisdiction even
have breakfast before Liturgy? I heard that Bishop So-and-so even had coffee
with those godless Catholics right before Liturgy. Besides, it was at three
a.m. when I had the coffee, and it’s almost ten now.»
A little
after, thought the priest. «Why didn’t you start your rule a little earlier?»
«Well,
the book I just read said it must only be done after midnight, as that is the
time to battle demons. Besides, Madonna was on ‘Saturday Night Live.’ Uh . . .
the video clips of hers really led me into a big temptation … so I did all
those prostrations.»
Father
really did not know what to address first. «Father,» Bill asked, «don’t you
think it’s time to start being more traditional, to get rid of those paraffin
candles and use real beeswax? It is more Orthodox. It really bothers me that
the choir reads half the texts of the vigil, instead of singing them, like last
night. And on the wrong calendar too. It took me three hours just to repeat the
vigil on the right calendar! I’m afraid I am going to have to find another
jurisdiction that is more Orthodox. Am I the only one in this parish who knows
how to do things right? Besides, I have invited my Elder to meet you, and he’ll
set you straight on all this stuff. He told me we have to do everything
correctly, like they do it, otherwise we’ll all burn in hell.»
Father
was losing patience, looking at his watch, 10:20 and counting. «Okay, Vasili,
look, there are a number of issues here, and we need to talk about them, but
not while the whole church is waiting for you to finish. When did you go to
confession last?»
«Yesterday,
at the monastery. I think I have finally found a spiritual father worthy of my
obedience.»
«And who
is he?»
«Fr.
So-and-so, from the monastery in the mountains. He is coming to serve with you
next Sunday.»
«Bill . .
.»
«Vasili.»
«Okay, Vasili,
then. That guy was defrocked years ago. I can’t serve with him! Who gave you a
blessing to go see him? Much less submit yourself to him? Much less invite him
here?»
«Oh, so
you too are continuing to persecute that righteous man! I know in my heart he
is truly Orthodox! Besides he baptized me yesterday, making up for what you did
not do by chrismating me. Actually,» getting excited, «why am I here anyway? I
should really go be with him as the true criterion of Orthodoxy. . . Not in
this modernist, ecumenist jurisdiction. My spiritual father may have been
defrocked, but he is obedient to God, not those godless bishops! I know it
because I feel it in my heart. ..»
«So,»
said Father, rather irritated, «why do you want to go to communion here
anyway?»
«What!
You would deny me my right to go to communion!» he whined, as he stormed out.
Monastery Life Vs. Parish Life
This
story is a rather extreme, but not entirely uncommon, example of what can go
wrong when laypeople—especially those who are spiritually immature— take to
visiting monasteries for the wrong reasons and in the wrong spirit.
The
growth of monasteries in North America over the past thirty years, and
especially in the past five years, has brought about a tremendous opportunity
for faithful Orthodox Christians to visit monasteries as pilgrims and be
exposed to monastic tradition. A monastery, among other things, is a place
which practices the liturgical and spiritual life in a maximalist way. This
maximalism is expressed in a number of ways, including long, full services,
strict ascetic discipline, and very conservative attitudes in everything from
language, style, and dress to how one conducts one’s personal life. Many
confuse monastic maximalism and conservatism with a kind of reactionary ethnic
agenda. This is a great mistake, however.
The
monasteries incarnate Orthodox culture, regardless of what ethnic flavor it may
have. It is the timeless, universal (Catholic) culture passed on by the holy
fathers and mothers of the Orthodox Church, through personal discipleship and
obedience. The monastic culture is nothing other than obedience to the Gospel,
through discipleship to our spiritual fathers, who convey the tradition of how
to live out the Gospel in its fullness. To visit an Orthodox monastery is not
just to visit that particular community in that place at that time. It is to
enter into that living Christian culture which has been handed over from
generation to generation by the holy fathers.
Monasticism,
the way of repentance, is a radically different way of life from living in the
world, with a family, a job, and in a parish. Parishes are the front lines of
where the Church meets the world, where a culture is sanctified and transformed
by the Gospel. People lead busy lives in the world, and are not able to lead as
active a liturgical life as in a monastery. Parish life seldom is and often
cannot be maximalist in ethos. Yet a parish is not a compromise, a second-class
way of being a Christian. Being a Christian in the world is taking the Gospel
to the world, and living and witnessing to Christ while participating fully and
actively in the culture. This is a very high calling!
Monastics
have a different calling: to be «not of this world,» and to structure their
lives solely by the Gospel, and by the traditions of the Church, especially the
liturgical cycles. It is very important to remember that there is no difference
between the services prescribed for a parish and those of a monastery. There is
no difference in the rules of fasting, prayer, or piety. The main difference is
that people in parishes are engaged in the world, and monks are not. The
monasteries are critically important to the life of the parishes: they
constitute the reservoir of the living Tradition, in its purity, where people
can experience the Gospel lived out in a radical way. Monasticism can inform
their lives, inspire faithful laity to greater dedication of their lives to
Christ and the Gospel, and provide a place of healing and spiritual
consolation.
But as
Bill/Vasili’s story illustrates, there are also some great temptations that
people can fall into in visiting monasteries. These temptations are all
centered around spiritual pride, and the prelest (delusion) which can go along
with it.
1.
The Trap of Spiritual Pride
Spiritual
pride is an easy trap for those new to the faith, who are newly exposed to
monastic life, and who are seeking and striving to live an authentic Orthodox
spiritual life. It can especially be a trap for those visiting monasteries,
seeking spiritual direction, and not knowing what an authentic Orthodox life in
the world, in a parish, is all about.
Faithful
people go to monasteries, and see people’s piety and how things are done in
that monastic tradition, and want to emulate it—but without understanding it.
Pilgrims go and encounter spiritual elders and monks who live lives which, in
their view, are more «spiritual» than that of their own parish priest—so they
judge him as inadequate to fit their spiritual needs. They go to confession,
develop a spiritual relationship with a spiritual father or mother in a
monastery, and think that theirs is the only way to salvation. They receive
spiritual direction which they may interpret wrongly. Sometimes, people just get
some bad advice, and uncritically turn it into the ultimate criterion of
spiritual life. And sometimes people will go to a monastery or spiritual father
who has been disciplined by the Church, and disregarded the discipline. Then
the pilgrim-turned-disciple gets caught up in the self-justification of the
errant elder, which in some cases has created a schism.
Excessive
external piety, false humility, preoccupation with gossip and «issues» in the
life of the Church, judging people on their piety or stance in these issues,
complete assurance that one knows exactly how things should be done, and
perhaps most dangerous of all, idolizing a person or place as the ultimate
criterion of Orthodoxy, can all be symptoms of this malady. They are all
aspects of spiritual immaturity. What is missing in all this is Christ and the
real spiritual struggle with oneself.
2.
Excessive Piety
Zeal for
Christ and the Church are great and wonderful things; but authentic zeal is
very different from a zeal that comes from one’s passions. Carnal zeal always
has some element of self-gratification or self-centeredness, by which one
justifies oneself as truly Orthodox, truly pious, and «in the know.» Authentic
zeal is not directed towards anything but union in Christ, or against anything
but one’s own fallenness. With true zeal, there is no hypocrisy. False zeal,
the delusion of spiritual pride and conceit, is always hypocritical.
Piety is
an important way of personalizing the experience and mystery of the faith.
Bowing, making the sign of the cross, behaving reverently, and all the other
forms given to us by the Tradition are very useful in this. But they are never
to be used except to express one’s own love for God. They should never be used
to «teach» others who are doing things «wrong,» or to try to «convict» people
of their impiety; much less, to show others that «I know how to do things
‘right’.» In many monasteries, the rules for external expression of piety—
bowing, crossing oneself, prostrations, and so forth—are observed very
carefully; in parishes, however, they often are not. One should never attract
attention to oneself through external piety. That only feeds the pride and
self-centeredness that is in us, and distracts other people from their prayers.
The rules
of fasting also fall into this category. Monasteries generally follow the rules
quite strictly. And there is no difference whatsoever in the rules for fasting
between monks and laity. That does not mean, however, that one should ever
judge another, much less comment, on how someone fasts or doesn’t fast. Not
only is it usually hypocritical, but it misses the point. Fasting, and all the
other rules of the Church, are a means and not an end. If we fast, and feel
proud about it, and condemn another for not being so strict, it would have been
better for us if we had not fasted at all (Romans 14:3 ff).
The same
rule applies to the liturgical life of the Church. Monasteries, by their very
constitution, serve the liturgical services very fully and according to the
ancient St. Sabbas Typikon. Services can go on for hours and hours, sometimes,
and occupy a major proportion of each day. There is no difference whatever, at
least in the Slavic traditions, in the services prescribed for monasteries and
those for parishes. For a pilgrim to a monastery, while at first the services
may seem a real chore, and too long, eventually they grow on you, and you want
nothing else. Parish services, abbreviated out of pastoral necessity, can seem
incomplete.
There are
a couple of temptations here. The first is to think that the monasteries are
doing it «right,» while the parish is doing it «wrong.» The second temptation
is to think that there is not as much grace in the parish services, and that
the services and liturgical/spiritual life are not being taken seriously. This
inevitably leads to judging the parish priest as less «spiritual» and lazy
because he cuts the services. Little do we remember that at our first monastic
services we were the first to sit down when we had a chance, and glance at our
watches every five minutes, wondering if and when it was ever going to end!
Parishes abbreviate out of pastoral necessity, and at the discretion of the
pastor. One must not judge a priest or parish when they are doing all they can!
3.
Judgmentalism
The
biggest sin is to judge some one, especially the priest. The standard we set
for the priest is usually impossibly high, something we ourselves could never
live up to. Thus, any such judgment is immediately hypocrisy. The life of a
parish priest is very different, filled with completely different cares,
concerns, and responsibilities, from that of a priestmonk in a monastery. The
laity see very little of the actual life of their priest. Many think he only
works for two hours on Sundays! But to be a pastor is actually an
eighty-plus-hour-a-week job. How can the laity judge him? And especially his
«spirituality»?
The
priestmonk may appear to be more «spiritual» because he is in church for six or
eight hours a day, and has few other responsibilities. Try to do that with a
family, and dozens or hundreds of parishioners to serve! The asceticism of
being in the world and serving Christ, whether as priest or layperson, is
equally as great as that of a monk in a monastery. It takes as profound a
«spirituality» to do it. But the details will differ with the circumstances.
4.
Abuse of Spiritual Guidance
Often
people will go to monasteries for spiritual guidance and confession. It is a
venerable and ancient Orthodox tradition to have a priestmonk in a monastery as
a spiritual father, and to submit one’s life to him. Sometimes people will go
to a great elder, mostly for the big questions in life. It is also true that
some people will connect better with their parish priest than others. This
should be supported by the parish clergy.
If the
Church is a spiritual hospital, the monasteries are the intensive care wards,
with the specialists. You don’t go to a family doctor for cancer; but you also
don’t go to a neurosurgeon for a cold. The great elders are those specialists
who through years of ascetic purification and experience know how to deal with
many of the big questions in life that people bring. Many have great spiritual
gifts. Many do not. Most monastics are not elders by any stretch of the
imagination. This does not compromise their ability to serve as confessor,
consoler, and spiritual father. Whether it is a parish priest, a priestmonk, an
eldress, or a great elder, the source of the advice and consolation is
ultimately the same: God.
A true
elder is one who always leaves a person with a profound sense of freedom, even
when he reveals to a person the will of God. There is never any manipulation or
personal agenda. The elder simply wants the salvation of the person, and is a
vessel for him of God’s love and forgiveness. The great temptation is to
idolize the elder, and even substitute him/her for Christ. A personality cult
leads to the destruction of both the elder and the disciples.
Obedience
is very important in the spiritual life. Obedience, however, is always within
certain boundaries. It can never involve doing what is illegal or immoral. True
spiritual obedience has one end: to lead us to obedience to God. It is always
within the Church, always toward a more profound level of communion, both
ecclesially and personally.
A great
temptation, especially for Americans, is to try to find an elder (read also
priest or bishop) who is «worthy of my obedience.» This is complete spiritual
pride and delusion. We may think that we need a great elder, only the best, to
submit ourselves to, because only such a gifted one could understand us, and «I
could only associate myself with someone who could recognize and develop my
unique potential.» This is presumption, conceit, and arrogance, presuming
oneself to be on the highest of spiritual planes. In reality, especially if we
have such an attitude, the last person we would be able to deal with would be a
great elder of profound spiritual life, who would quickly cut us down to size.
Our pride could not handle that, and we would disregard his advice—even,
paradoxically, if what he advises would be the best thing for us.
5.
Ecclesiastical Gossip
A last
great temptation is to get involved in gossip about people, places, practices,
and especially the «issues» confronting the Church. Whether it is who is doing
what, how they serve this or that service and with whom, or the like, which is
all gossip; or whether it involves the greater problems confronting the Church,
such as ecumenism, the calendar, or what they are or are not teaching at such
and such a seminary; there is very little fruitful and much more that is sinful
in all that idle talk. The Lord said that we will be accountable for each word.
Not only
does this gossip involve judging people, especially hierarchs, clergy, and
teachers who will have to answer for themselves before God; it distracts us
from the one thing needful: to pursue our own salvation. We are only
accountable to God for our own salvation, not for issues which we can have no
effect on. One of the saddest things is that monasteries tend to attract people
who in the name of being serious about their spiritual-life fall into this
delusion, while all this kind of gossip and factionalism actually destroys
their souls.
It is bad
enough that people talk about such things in person; many also read whole
publications that are essentially scandal sheets. The Internet is perhaps the
worst vehicle for such gossip. This is nothing other than ecclesiastical
pornography. It must be avoided at all costs!
Why We Should Visit Monasteries
Faithful
Orthodox Christians should go on pilgrimage to monasteries often, should strive
to emulate the piety and asceticism of the monastics as far as possible, and
should seek the counsel of monastic spiritual fathers and mothers. The
temptations and trials come primarily from our own spiritual immaturity and
ignorance. We have to be aware of our weaknesses, and strive for the authentic
spiritual values of humility, faith, and love.
The
prayer of St. Ephraim should always be with us, as the overall guide for our
spiritual life: O Lord and Master of my life, do not give me the spirit of
sloth, faintheartedness, lust of power, and idle talk; but give rather the
spirit of chastity, humility, patience, and love to Thy servant. Yea, O Lord
and King, grant me to see my own sins and not to judge my brother, for blessed
art Thou unto ages of ages. Amen!
By Hieromonk Jonah (Paffhausen)
Published in AGAIN magazine
Source: http://www.kiev-orthodox.org/site/english/722/
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