March 13, 1876
Greetings, sister in Christ, dear Mother T.! I
congratulate you on accepting the holy and angelic image. Do you know that this
image is the symbol of betrothal with Jesus, the Heavenly Bridegroom? For it is
sung in the troparion to a martyr, “I love You, my Bridegroom”, and for every
nun is a martyr, remember, to Whom you are betrothed!
You ask me for guidance and advice on what you should
do in order not to deviate from your path? Start with humility. Then do with
humility and finish with humility. Thus you will reach holiness. This path, the
path of humility, is the safest one. Holy Fathers say, this path just “prevent
you from falling down. Where can a humble one fall, when he considers himself
worse than anyone?” So, how can we not be humble, when Christ, the God of gods
and the Lord of lords, humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of
death, even the death of the cross (Philippians 2:8)? The astonishment of
angels, the most beautiful of all sons of the humankind, died a shameful death
for us; how dare we, weak and sinful, reject to admit our sins and weaknesses?
What concerns high thoughts: avoid them like the
plague. “What is highly esteemed among men is an abomination in the sight of
God” (Luke 16:15). “And the heavens are not pure in His sight” (Job 15:15). And
Prophet Isaiah said long ago what any our truth is: “all our righteousnesses
are like filthy rags” (Isaiah 64:6).
You ask how can one follow his way? Listen not to me,
a filthy man, but to the Eternal Truth Itself: “No one, having put his hand to
the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God” (Luke 9:62).
It means that anyone who is going to reach the Kingdom
of Heaven, must not recall their high virtues – and especially their high
thoughts – but must look at the feats and glory of saints. Let us stick to
them! But you should look at your own weaknesses and sins and remember about
the possible future torments of a soul – then you will not sin.
Peace to you, mother T.
– Sinful Hieromonk
Anatoliy
CONVERSATION