According
to surveys, nearly one-third of Orthodox Christian teens are unsure whether
pornography is right or wrong. This is approximately the same number as that of
teens who are unsure whether premarital sex is right or wrong. This is very
telling in two ways. First, teens who are unsure about premarital sex are
probably also unsure about pornography. And second, while the Church makes its
position very clear–premarital sex and pornography are wrong–it needs to do a
better job of explaining why. In this short paper, I would like to step away
from the words ‘right’ and ‘wrong.’ After all, Christ did not come to bring us
laws and legislations. Sins are not right or wrong because someone issued a
regulation. Instead, I would like to talk about things that are good for you or
bad for you.
The
Church teaches us that sexual intimacy is an important part of the sacrament of
marriage: there, it has its rightful place; there, it helps the two become one;
and there, it fulfills all of its functions–from the expression of love and
commitment to the co-creation with God in continuing the human race. Marriage
is a sacrament with the “principal and ultimate goal [of] the spiritual and moral
perfection of the spouses.” As with any sacrament, that which is sacramental,
should not be used for profane purposes. Imagine that a priest throws a party
in the holy altar, and then on Sunday, after having picked up the trash, he
serves the Divine Liturgy there. Or, he uses the chalice to drink his coffee in
the mornings, and then on Sunday he uses it for the Eucharist. Even on an
intuitive level we understand that this would be blasphemy. And yet, it is the
same with our bodies. The Apostle Paul teaches that “your body is a temple of
the Holy Spirit” (1 Cor. 6:19), and it belongs to your spouse for the
fulfillment of the sacrament of marriage (7:4)–whether we are married now or
will one day be married. Imagine your love for your spouse as a cup filled to
the brim, and you want to give all of it, the fullness of it to your beloved.
If you start bumping into strangers along the way or allowing them to take some
of what you are carrying, then you will not be able to preserve the fullness of
your love, and will hand to your beloved a cup half-empty, if not altogether
unworthy of a sacrament.
All of
this can be said about premarital sex in general, but what about pornography?
Pornography is just as bad as premarital sex, but more dangerous. When a person
engages in a sexual act with another person, both are aware that they are
giving up a part of themselves; and the more partners a person has, the more
fractured he or she becomes. But pornography camouflages itself as something
unreal, virtual, something that is one’s private business, something that does
not hurt anyone. Our culture tells us that we are free to do whatever we want,
as long as it does not hurt anyone. Let us heed this advice and remember that
‘anyone’ means us as well. Let us make sure that whatever we do does not hurt
us physically or spiritually.
Christ
said: “…every one who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery
with her in his heart” (Matt. 5:28). The reason Christ equates looking
lustfully, the very definition of pornography, with adultery, a physical act,
is because we are not some bags full of disconnected parts–body, soul, mind,
spirit, will, etc.–but whole and interconnected beings. If we have a toothache,
our mind may become irritable; and if our mind is anxious, our whole body may
ache. This is why when we allow pornography to enter into our eyes and our
mind, our entire being is affected. The “virtual” sin of pornography most often
leads to very physical masturbation. And once something is seen, it cannot be
unseen–it imbeds itself in the mind, the memory, the subconscious. We would not
want to share our spouse and our marriage bed with a bus-load-full of porn
actors and actresses. But in reality, this is what we do when our minds are
polluted with pornorgaphy and we enter into the sacrament of marriage bringing
all those “passengers” along. On second thought, porn ‘actors’ and ‘actresses’
perform sexual acts for money, and there is another term for that–prostitution.
The Apostle Paul says that “he who joins himself to a prostitute becomes one
body with her” (1 Cor. 6:16). These are very powerful words. This means that
when we commit adultery in the heart–watch pornography–we become one with that
prostitute, instead of our spouse. This is not only destructive to the
sacrament of marriage, but also to our own souls: with how many prostitutes can
one become one before the soul is completely broken, damaged, fractured, and
polluted?
Ways to Fight Against Pornography
1) Avoid those television shows, movies,
magazines, and websites that arouse sexual passion. It is much easier to fight
against sin while it is still a little worm than to battle it once it becomes a
fire-breathing dragon.
2) Do not underestimate the brute power of
sexual desire. People have killed and died under the influence of the sexual
passion. Do not play with fire or you risk being burnt.
3) Remember that demons, including those of
lust, are best resisted through prayer and fasting. Pray often and ask God for
help. Keep the real fast, not a vegan diet.
4) Keep your eyes and your mind on our Savior
and His Most Pure Mother. If you spend time on the computer or watch
television–place an icon next to the screen. If looking at what is on your
screen and in the eyes of Christ at the same time makes you uncomfortable or
ashamed, then something is wrong with what is on your screen. Do something
about it! (There is an OFF button on every device.)
5) Seek healing in repentance. Once something is
seen it cannot be unseen. But God can heal and restore the soul. Remember:
repentance is not feeling bad about something. It is a firm decision to turn
away from sin and turn to God. It is a decision to fight against sin, not
merely feel bad about having committed it. It is a sacrament of reconciliation
with God, not a formality of entering a guilty plea on a heavenly court docket.
By Fr. Sergei Sveshnikov
Source: https://frsergei.wordpress.com/2015/03/30/pornography/
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