Teaching
children to fast is very basic in an Orthodox Christian upbringing, like
teaching them to pray. The question of when and how strictly to have one's
children begin fasting should be discussed with a spiritual father. If a family
does not have a spiritual father and the family is involved in a parish where
fasting is not encouraged, especially among the children, one should ask God to
present the family with an opportunity to find a spiritual father who can guide
the family in the True Orthodox Christian life.
Today
many children have dairy and egg allergies and live their entire childhood
without these foods. Many people do not eat meat at all, for philosophical
reasons, and raise their children on a meat-free diet. There are cultures in
the world whose diet have no or a only a very limited amount of meat and dairy,
and in many cases, the people of these cultures are physically healthier than
Americans. So, it's not a matter of depriving children--it's simply a different
way of cooking.
A child's
ability to fast during the Great Lent depends a lot on how the child eats
during non-fasting times. If a child's primary foods are meat and dairy, then
fasting will likely be difficult. But if a child is accustomed to eating a
variety of legumes, whole grains, fruits and vegetables, then in most cases,
fasting will not be difficult. It is important to have your children eat a
variety of legumes, grains, fruits and vegetables throughout the year, so that
they will be accustomed to these kinds of foods and will not find fasting to be
such a dramatic change in diet.
Yet,
again, establishing a fasting rule for the children in a family must be done
under the guidance of a spiritual father. It is possible to become overzealous
for having our children keep a full fast, and a spiritual father would temper
this and guide the family on the path that is best for the children's physical
health and spiritual development.
It is
helpful to educate yourself what constitutes a healthy, nutritious diet for
fasting so that you and your children will not suffer any deficiencies.
(Serving your family peanut butter and jelly for lunch and pasta for dinner for
40 days is not a healthy diet and will make your family--especially your
husband--hate fasting.)
For
children who keep a strict fast the morning of receiving Holy Communion, it is
helpful to make sure that they are fed a substantial, nutritious meal the
evening before. If you are in a parish where the Divine Liturgy is late in the
morning and the children have difficulty keeping a strict fast for the entire
morning, it can be helpful to serve the previous night's dinner or give the
children an additional protein-filled snack (and water if they are able),
before they go to bed the night before the Divine Liturgy.
That's Just What We Do
Our
children are born into a family that fasts on Wednesdays, Fridays and during
Church fasting periods. They get plenty to eat each day during those times. We
are amazed at how many Orthodox Christian families do not make fasting part of
their regular routine. We feel it's easier for children to grow up used to that
aspect of the Orthodox Christian faith rather than having to learn to fast as
adults. On the other hand, we are not "label readers" and discourage
that in our children.
On Parish Life and Fasting
We
understand that it is difficult to fast, and some of us many have special food
requirements. Parish leaders and organizers: please, if it is a fast period and
there is a retreat/youth function do not serve children non-fasting food. We
are not judging you or others if you break the fast, but it is very difficult
for us parents to keep to the fasting calendar and then have it broken in the
church, of all places. Please have all Sunday School teachers/youth groups
leaders and parishioners who cook for the parish know not to feed children
non-fasting food during the fasts or to verbally criticize the fasts of the
Church. Further, please do not call us "fanatics" for following the
Church fasting rules.
Prepare Them for Difficult Days
The Elder
(Geronda) Athanasios had personal experience with true physical hunger during
WWII. Over 300,000 civilians died in Athens, Greece alone from starvation, tens
of thousands more through reprisals by Nazis and collaborators, and the
country's economy was ruined. He saw starvation with his own eyes, was himself
truly hungry, and knew that it would always be possible for times of hunger to come
to any people at any time.
"I
know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I
have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer
need." (Philippians 4:12)
In other
words, when I have plenty of food, I do not eat like a glutton, and when I am
hungry I have learned not to blaspheme God. I have learned the lesson to have
plenty, to be rich without being attracted and attached to have plenty, to be
rich without being attracted and attached to these things; but I can also go
hungry without doubting God and questioning what is going to happen to
me--maybe God forgot me or maybe God died. No; Saint Paul says, I have
everything I need and then some. I have everything I need and I abound! (cf.,
Philippians 4:18). Holy Saint Paul, you were in jail for three years! Two years
in Caesarea and one year in Rome and what do you have?
He says,
"I have everything and I abound." Saint Paul is not lying. Do you see
how a person can discipline himself, how he can be conditioned? My friends,
what are you going to do when you keep filling your children up with chocolate,
ice cream cakes, cream cheese and fresh butter? What is going to happen in a
period of hunger? We need to teach the children to fast, to learn (even with
all of today's technical means) to withstand some mild suffering, so they will
be able to survive some difficult days if they happen to come upon us. If they
are trained in this way of the difficult days of their lives, like Saint Paul
they will say, I know how to live with plenty and I know how to survive with
next to nothing.
Fasting With Joy
As to
fasting before Holy Communion, we do a great disservice to our children by not
teaching them to joyfully fast when they are young. Whatever you do, set a good
example and do not complain about fasting in front of them. They are young but
they are not foolish. Teach them why we fast.
Attention Span and Snacks
Children
without health problems can go the length of a Divine Liturgy without food and
drink. Please don't bring cheerios, or any food or drink (or gum) to church.
Blessed Meals
Pray
while cooking or preparing food for yourself and your family. Make the sign of
the Cross over your food and drinks. Always pray before eating, at minimum make
the sign of the Cross; and do not be embarrassed about blessing your food in
public or your children will feel the same way. (Source: Orthodox Christian
Parenting. Cultivating God's Creation by Zoe Press)
Source: http://saintandrewgoc.org/home/2017/10/11/how-to-teach-children-to-fast
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