I can’t begin to count the number
of times I’ve heard parents discussing the difficult task of raising children
right in a world gone wrong. How do we
raise children with strong morals and values, when the world is drowning in
immorality? How do we teach them to set
themselves apart from that which is wrong?
One of the most important things
we, as parents, can do for our children is offer them positive role
models. And as most of us will agree,
that can be a very daunting task nowadays.
Now that school is back is session, this is especially important because
our children are being exposed to things they aren’t normally exposed to in
their Orthodox homes.
I recently spoke with a group of
teen and tween-aged girls on the subject of role models. I asked them to answer a prompt without
thinking too much about the answer, to simply give the first answer that popped
into their mind. The prompt was: Name
three famous sisters. few of them
giggled and looked around at each other but no one would answer.
So I fished some more, “C’mon,
you know who I’m talking about. We
usually see them in pictures together.”
Then one brave soul blurted out,
“The Kardashians?”
It wasn’t the answer I was hoping
for but it was the one I expected. The
answer I was looking for were Saints Faith, Hope and Agapi; three young sisters
who gave up their lives for our Lord Jesus Christ. The majority of them were familiar with the
girls mother, St. Sophia, but none of them had ever heard of her three
daughters.
Try it on your children. Ask them how many cartoon characters they
could name. Then ask how many saints
could they name. Two? Eight? A dozen if
you’re lucky. And we can blame no one
but ourselves for this. We expect our children to stay in the church and
understand our traditions and always do the right thing, and, and, and, but how
can we expect all of this if we’re not teaching them?
Why aren’t we passing these
treasures on to our children? Why are we filling their heads with imaginary
kingdoms but not filling their hearts with zeal for a real-life kingdom?
It’s so easy to overlook teaching
them about the importance of saints in our lives. We forget to remind them to look up to them
and ask for their intercessions. They’re
only children, we say. And yes, they are children. But then again, so were
Faith, Hope and Agapi. The eldest sister was only 12; the youngest was 9.
When their mother, St. Sophia
called them together before they were to appear before the emperor, she tried
to strengthen their spirits by saying, “My beloved daughters, the greatest joys
of my earthly life…Our trials may be great—eventually leading to our
deaths. The path we are about to take
ends in defeat and death for those who do not know Christ. For those of us who know Him, it ends in
victory and eternal life…Remember, my darlings, physical pain lasts
momentarily; the Kingdom of God lasts forever.”
And do you know how those precious souls responded? Instead of hiding in fear, like I surely
would have, they in turn tried to strengthen and soothe her spirit. “Don’t be
afraid, dearest Mother, we will remember your words and pray that our Lord will
keep all of us strong so that we may enter His kingdom together.”
And then they prayed
together. How many of us pray with our
children on a daily basis? How can we
expect them to follow Christ as He instructed (Matthew 16:24) if they are not
armed with prayer?
Sometimes we rationalize these
things in our minds. But SHE was a
saint, I am not! How can I have that
kind of strength? But saints are not
born, they’re created. She was not born a
saint, she was born a typical human being like all of us. The only difference is she chose to follow
Christ. One of the many benefits of
being Orthodox is the rich spiritual inheritance we’ve been given; the lives of
the saints. We have all the answers we
need on how to live a holy life in a sinful world. We can all do what she did. We just have to want it bad enough.
We spend so much time making sure
our children “fit in” (and fit in to what exactly?), when we should be spending
that time teaching them how to stand out.
Each and every one of our children should be a light. They should carry the light of Christ inside
of them for all to see.
Let your
light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your
Father in heaven. Matthew 5:16
Teach your children to love, not
fight. To give rather than take. To show compassion and humility instead of
passing judgment on others. If we, as
Orthodox Christians don’t do this, who will?
Opportunities to teach these things present themselves every day! We need to be teaching them these things in
both our words and actions.
Now that we have begun a new
school and ecclesiastical year, let’s start anew. Here are a few simple suggestions:
– Begin and
end each day by reading prayers together as a family.
– Teach
your children of spiritual warfare. St.
Kosmas Aitolos said, “Life is spiritual warfare, and if you’re not fighting
you’re losing.”
– Teach
them how to use a prayer rope and pray the Jesus Prayer.
– Teach
them to live a God-pleasing life just as their patron saints and the Theotokos
did. Remind them they are soldiers for
Christ. Arm them every single day.
My children look forward to being
“armed for battle” every morning. I make
the sign of the cross with holy oil on their foreheads; their armor. I give them each a piece of antidoro (take an
extra piece on Sunday and cut into small pieces for the rest of the week) and a
sip of holy water; their strength. And
we double check to make sure they have their weapons; their cross and prayer
rope. Then we leave for school and I
have the peace of mind knowing that God and His holy Mother and all the saints
are surrounding my children with their protection.
A time is coming when men will go
mad, and when they see someone who is not mad, they will attack him, saying,
‘You are mad; you are not like us.
- St.
Anthony the Great
The world has gone mad and our
responsibility as Orthodox Christian parents has become even greater. It is our children who will carry Christ’s
light into the future. Are they
ready? Have we prepared them?
Source: http://pemptousia.com/2015/08/our-spiritual-inheritance/
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