By Archimandrite
Andrew (Konanos)
Come to your beloved person and tell how much you love
him, kiss him and show him all your tenderness.
One of my acquaintances received a blessing from his
spiritual father to consume some meat even during Great Lent because he works physically
a lot and gets very tired. However. His wife is keeping the fast rather
strictly, and this is why she is worrying and reproaching him because he does
not go to church often. Her husband said to me: “Father, I can’t stand it
anymore. Tell her something, She will listen to you”. I replied: “Who told you
she would listen to me? What is wrong with her behavior? What is the problem?”
And he told me: “Here is what’s going on. I am not obsessed with meat, but
since I work physically all day long, I have to consume it. As soon as I am
going to eat a piece of meat, she comes to the table and stands near. “Why are
you eating meat?” Father, I perceive what I eat as lenten food. Is this steak
really insolent? But my wife doesn’t let me eat in peace. I seems I’m not fed
with the steak, but what I’m really fed up with is her constant grievance”.
I spoke to his wife, but she did not understand me,
too. She does not even want to. I advised her: “Let him be. God doesn’t demand
fasting from him now. Show your husband your love at first, and then you can do
what you want”. – “No, father, I ask him to listen to all your lectures so that
he become better”. – “But he doesn’t want to do this.” – “He must do this
anyway”.
Try to solve your problems. Strange situations happen
sometimes. I am sure you think sometimes, “It is so good I have married”, while
the other time you may think, “Wasn’t it a wrong decision?” Everyone experience
such periods. Everyone is good. Say to your beloved person how sincerely you
love him and kiss him. Say “my love” when you address him and give him all your
warm. Will you do this? You will not!.. I know it can be difficult for you, you
may feel embarrassed. One woman said to me: “I can’t do what you ask me to do,
but I can show him my feelings in another way”. – “In what way?” – “I will cook
some rolls of grape leaves. He loves them very much, and thus he will
understand everything”.
One child told be a similar story: “When my mother
wants to please me, she cooks pasticcio. But when she is angry about me, she
cooks bamia!
I understand. You have problems now. It hurts… I would
like to accompany you a bit. For no reason, I will not teach you at all. I just
want to be with you. You wrote to me at Facebook about this great sorrow you
faced. I know what is going on. You told me about everything. I want only one
thing: let us pray to Christ together, let us appeal to His grace, His strength
and feel His presence and help.
From the book by Fr. Andrew (Konanos),
“There
are certain difficulties in the marriage…”
Translated
by The Catalog of Good Deeds
Source: http://pravlife.org/ru/content/arhim-andrey-konanos-sovetuet-kak-pravilno-pokazat-svoyu-lyubov-samym-blizkim-lyudyam
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