“Magnify the Lord with me and let us exalt
His name together” (Psalm 34:3)
In
pre-revolutionary Russia, when a seminarian proposed to the girl he hoped to
marry and to have as his life’s companion, consort or “Matushka,” he would send
her a note with the above words from the Bible. See what it suggests? You and I
with God to guide us will go through life having a common purpose. Yes,
marriage is about love, but it includes the Source of love, the greatest
Teacher of affection between a man and a woman, because He gives meaning to
life itself. Let them expand their understanding of God’s mighty deeds in
creation in ways that Adam and Eve would not achieve. To magnify the Lord is to
increase our own souls and broaden our perspective of His mighty works. To
exalt the Lord is to sing praises to His name not only by our voices, but also
by our deeds. How we live amplifies His glory beyond the chanting of our
prayers.
Certainly
one can do that on his own; however, the prayer to “Our Father” is enhanced
when two or more utter the phrase “hallowed be Thy name.” It includes the
entire Church not only globally but also along with those who have gone before
us to their rest. Yet in the parish and the community the joint effort to
augment the awareness of God’s presence in the lives of others is a glorious
way to “exalt His name together.”
The
beautiful phrase is not only for priests’ families. Every married couple can
make it their motto. When two people choose to be wed in the Orthodox Church,
they are committing themselves to welcome the Holy Trinity in their lives.
Being crowned with honor and glory is assuming responsibility for a realm that
includes home and offspring. It presumes engagement with obstacles that come
about from time to time that thwart and challenge the royal couple. Your wife
is always your best friend. She must never be treated as an object, or in the
degrading phrase our fallen culture uses: arm candy. The reason OJ Simpson went
from national football hero to persona non grata in the nation was not only
because he got away with murder, but because he was unable to let Nicole be
herself. She was for him a possession, not a person.
And the
wife must bear in mind: Your husband is also your neighbor, in the image Jesus
used to explain the definition in the parable of the Good Samaritan. This
culture so intent on avoiding sacrifice and pain will do little to restore
harmony in the home—but the third Partner will never fail. They are blessed by
Jesus Christ, He who was at their wedding as He was in Cana of Galilee, He who
hears every prayer and responds to every heartfelt plea.
But it’s
imperative that the man and wife grow together in mutual respect and support.
They are like mountain climbers tied to each other. They both must struggle
ever onward and upward. When one fails to keep up his end, the other will fall
with him.
Even when
they both share the tasks, to exalt the Lord together means that they grow
beyond selfishness. I’ve had so many cases where they appreciated the
counseling, congratulated choir and me for a glorious wedding, then dropped out
of Church commitment, even if they had formally been active members. In a way,
they extend the honeymoon to shut all others out. When that pattern of
self-indulgence becomes the norm, they are cut off from the life of the Church
and exist only in the secular society. If the Lord and His Church no longer
have a place in their homes and lives, what can they expect from their
children?
Source: https://oca.org/reflections/berzonsky/the-girl-that-i-marry
CONVERSATION