“They look at me as a traitor to the cause of
feminism, all because I choose to work willingly for the people who love me,
rather than to work for money for people who don't. Well, those gals can all
fight it out among themselves. I reject the feminist paradigm.”
Editor's note: Debates normally present the impassioned views of
people on both sides of a given subject. But in most cases, a third group of
people is left without a voice: What about those people who don't want to
participate in the debate? What are these people thinking, and why? For this
article, we sought the perspective of Susan Blazek, a faithful Orthodox
Christian wife and mother of seven, who is well educated, and who generally
doesn't bother with debating or blogging. We asked her to emerge from her
domestic paradise for just a few minutes, so she could write this article and
share her sane and peaceful perspective with others.
Several recent articles and comment threads
regarding feminism, Orthodoxy, and the modern mindset have led me to ponder
this one question: can I just be quiet?
I attended an academically rigorous Catholic
all-girls high school in the 80s, and feminism was in the very air we breathed.
We were encouraged to try to “have it all,” to forge new ground for women, and
not to worry about things like marriage or family. “We could do better,” we
were all told. Career and achievement were viewed as the highest goal. As the
valedictorian, I was expected to lead the charge, to do something great, to
make a difference. Looking back 28 years later, I like to think I have indeed
made a difference — but in a completely opposite way from what was expected.
Fast forward to today: my husband and I have 7
children, and we homeschool. Our lives center around our Orthodox church, the
liturgical cycle, educating our kids, and helping to care for our aging
parents. My day is filled with a mixture of laundry, Curious George, the Prologue
of Ohrid, geometry proofs, and proofing bread dough. It's busy and crazy, and
also deeply soul-nourishing. I wouldn't have it any other way.
Except possibly in one way: Am I allowed to
just be quiet? In Facebook discussions and the blog-o-sphere, everyone is
clamoring to make themselves heard, to express their opinion and to say their
piece. To have the last word and to definitively speak out. Feminism would
dictate that I participate in this fray; that I be strident and out-spoken,
upholding the Female Voice, and never backing down. However, I often want to
choose a different path: that of just not arguing. It doesn't mean that I lack
an active interior life, or that 10 pregnancies have turned my brain into Mommy
Mush; I just don't feel the need to be strident anymore.
Some people accuse me of "wasting my
education." They look at me as a traitor to the cause of feminism, all
because I choose to work willingly for the people who love me, rather than to
work for money for people who don't. Well, those gals can all fight it out
among themselves. I reject the feminist paradigm. I'll take my quiet Orthodox
life any day over what the world has to offer.
The world is not entitled to know, nor indeed
does it benefit from knowing, my every thought on every subject. Especially as
I grow in Orthodoxy, I think about saints who stayed silent in the face of
accusation, who withdrew into silence and meditation, who stayed so humble and
peace-seeking that they would even flee from visitors. There's no need to argue
anymore with strangers on the Internet. I just want to be small and still.
The world doesn't want me to be small. It wants
me, as a woman, to seek to enlarge my sphere of influence, to argue and strive
and add to the clamor.
But as an Orthodox wife and mother, I just want
to lead a quiet life. I want to focus on my soul, my marriage, my family, my
home, my church, and my church family. A quiet corner, a patch of green garden,
an icon corner to pray before, an apron to wipe my flour-covered hands on, and
a rocker in which to read great books to my children: that's all I
need. That's about it. A quiet life. That's enough for me. Why can't it be
enough for the rest of the world?
By Susan
Blazek
Source: https://russian-faith.com/family-values/quiet-life-quiet-wife-n1667
CONVERSATION