The Catalog of Good Deeds

A monk came to his mentor and asked:

— Father, I’ve been coming to you for so long. I’ve confessed my sins over and over again. You have given me so much advice but I still cannot improve. What is the use of my visits to you if I fall into the same sins again even after our meetings?

The spiritual father replied:

— My son, take two pots — one empty and the other filled with honey.

The disciple did so.

— And now, — the elder ordered, — pour the honey from one pot to the other several times.

And so he did.

— Now look at the empty pot and smell it.

The disciple looked and smelled and said:

— Father, the empty pot smells of honey and there is some honey on its bottom.

— This is how, — the spiritual father said, — my instructions sink into your soul. If you acquire at least some virtue in the course of your life, for Christ’s sake, the Lord in his mercy will add up to it and save your soul to live in the paradise. For a cook never puts pepper in a pot which smells of honey. Likewise, God will not reject you if you only keep in your soul the basics of righteousness.

Air is like God. It is always near, and you can’t see it. You learn how necessary it is when you lack it.

Sun is like God. It can both warm you up or burn you. You cannot look at it directly without pain in your eyes. All living creatures are drawn to it. All living creatures are fed by its power.

Sea is like God. When it is transparent and tender, it is like a Big One being tender towards a Small One. When it roars and seethes, you can’t argue with it.

A man is like God when he provides for his family and is ready to fight for it. And when he spares his words and seldom smiles.

A woman is like God, too, when she breastfeeds and when she gets up to her crying baby at night. When she dissolves in her children and breaks the habit of thinking about herself.

There’s so much in this world that is like God. Where do atheists come from?

Gagarin journeyed to the outer space. The Soviet radio announced that “we have flown into the space, and yet we haven’t seen God. Now we know for sure there is no God.”

Upon some consideration, a Christian retorted with, “Yes… seems you didn’t fly high enough...”

A new ship was roaming the seas for several years. It was light, fast, and could withstand any storm. It was pleasant to look at. Suddenly, in spite of calm and sunny weather, it sank for no evident reason whatsoever. When divers set out to inspect it, it turned out that the bottom of the ship had been eaten away by wood worms. The worms had multiplied and devoured the wood. The small holes that they had made proved to be fatal for the huge vessel.

This is true of the soul, too. Even a single worm of passions, left unattended, can multiply a thousandfold, generating new vices, conquering all parts of one's soul and corroding its healthy tissues.

Dirty laundry needs to be washed sooner or later. You can dump the dirty clothes into a huge vat to postpone the unpleasant moment when you have to wash that huge pile. The problem is that over time the dirt penetrates deeper into the fabric, and it becomes harder to rub it off. You may have to boil the laundry, burn your fingers and rub skin off your palms, and rub, rub, rub it as hard as you can… Many days, many years. Imagine how many dirty shirts can one accumulate in her lifetime? Alternatively, you can do the laundry as soon as your clothes become dirty. While the spots are still new, you can wash them away with water. Other spots will require soap. The deepest blemishes will require caustic alkali, which irritates your eyes. Every laundress will tell you that grease and blood are the most difficult kinds of dirt to wash. Our sins and bad actions are our dirty laundry, and each of us is his own laundress. We have a unique opportunity — great in some ways and bitter in other ways — not to accumulate our sins throughout our entire lives, until the very last moment when our actions will be judged, but to start compensating for them during our earthly lives, i.e., during the time when it is still possible to change something. It is a proper and reasonable way to go, so we shouldn’t be surprised when each white stripe in our lives is followed by a black one: imagine what blackness would await us after absolute whiteness?

An elder told a brother, “The devil is your enemy, and you are a house. The enemy never stops throwing all kinds of rubbish at you, trying to shove it onto you. However, you must be diligent in throwing the rubbish away and keeping your soul clean; if you become neglectful, your house will be filled up with the rubbish and you won’t be able to get inside. From the very beginning, as soon as the devil starts throwing his rubbish, you must collect it and throw it away, so that your house remains clean thanks to the grace of Christ.

A young disciple approached an elderly hermit and complained of being haunted by sinful thoughts. The elder took him outdoors into the open field.

— Spread out your lap… Open your bosom!

The disciple obeyed him.

— Can you stop the wind from blowing into your clothes?

— No, I can’t!..

— The same is also true with thoughts... We cannot stop their motion. We can only prevent them from remaining permanently in our souls…

Source: https://azbyka.ru/days/

Life gets busy and we don’t step back enough to see what we might be doing as parents to hurt our children’s spiritual growth. Being an intentional Orthodox Christian parent is hard work…but it’s worth it. We have a legacy of faith, wisdom and experience we can pass on to our kids if we pay attention. But if we don’t—we could cause more harm than good.

1. Buying them smartphones. People look at us like we’re freaks, but my husband and I refuse to buy smartphones for our kids. Not only are they expensive, but they allow unsupervised access to the internet, among many other faults. Some parents trick themselves into believing their kids will use internet on their smartphones for “educational” purposes. Yeah right. Don’t fool yourself. The internet, like the TV, is the devil’s playground when it’s not properly supervised. Your job as a parent is to protect your child’s innocence as long as possible. There’s a whole lot of nasty garbage out there that puts thoughts and ideas into their heads that they don’t need. Right now, their souls are like flowers just barely beginning to bloom. Don’t kill that spiritual growth with the world’s evils. And texting? Really, why do kids need texting? Have you looked around lately at all the kids glued to their phones because they’re so hooked on them they can’t put them down. Geez, don’t assist them in losing their childhood. Let kids be kids. Unplug them now because they don’t know how and they need your help.

2. Unsupervised computer use without parental controls. As with smartphones, the internet is full of temptations kids don’t have the ability to deal with. Statistics show the average nine year old has already been exposed to porn on the net.

Do not put a computer in their room. And if there already is one in there, take it out and put it in a prominent area of your home. Seriously, this is their innocence and their soul we’re talking about here. Our kids work on the computer in our family room where the screen is in our view. They can’t log in without our passwords, and we also have them keep to a two-hour computer time limit (which the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends) with breaks in between. Then, we send them outside to get fresh air and to do what kids are supposed to do—play.

3. Encouraging dating in early teen years. We’re pushing off dating as long as possible. Why? I don’t believe putting kids in tempting situations is good for them. Just because you may have dated at an early age and survived doesn’t mean they will. STD’s are at an all-time high. Early intimate relationships also increase risk of depression and suicide. They are still growing and learning about life. Doing things adults do in relationships is not only dangerous, but it’s a heck of an emotional load to put on a kid. They’ve got enough to worry about with homework, sports and college. You might think it’s cute, but when your child ends up telling you they’re pregnant or they have Herpes—it’s not so cute.

4. Being lax about prayer and going to church. In a world where the word religion is looked at as a bad word, and kids are being told rules don’t matter anymore—church is desperately needed. We do not pray enough. Our kids need to see us pray, and they need to see us make church a priority. And what if they tell you they don’t want to go? Go anyway. You’re the parent. Kids need structure, and they need to see you as an example of someone who strives to put God first, before everything else.

5. Not talking about the issues they face. Just because they act like everything is okay doesn’t mean it is. It’s crucial to connect with your kids every day. Show you care by asking about their day and actually listening to them. Take them out for dessert or to a coffee shop for one-on-one time. Ask their opinion on things with school, their teachers, friends, church—whatever. Help them by offering a non-judgmental, loving example of the Church’s viewpoint on current issues. Kids are confused today because the world is telling them so many things are okay that the church is saying are not. You can be the voice of reason and sanity for them, and by showing them respect and listening—they’re more likely to hear you.

6. Paganizing Christianity. Some things just aren’t Christian, no matter how you try to make them that way. While it’s great to have healthier alternatives, we can’t Christianize everything. Sadly, public school dances in many schools have now become a showcase of blatant immorality. My jaw almost dropped to the floor when my teenage daughter told me her junior high school’s dance last year included lap dancing and pole dancing. Then she mentioned later that “grinding” was rampant, and the punch got spiked. Huh? Yes, that’s right. Because the parent chaperones were afraid to say something, the kids got away with it. Throw in oversexualized lyrics, peer pressure, hormones and brains that haven’t grown completely—and you get a recipe for disaster. Come up with your own ways to celebrate that don’t include being immoral. This year, to substitute for a school dance, we’re looking at renting a boat and having our kids invite a friend to come along. We don’t mind spending a little money to give our kids a fun time with friends. Why waste a miserable night chaperoning a dance when our kids could have a better, cleaner time doing something fun with friends?

7. Too much freedom. It blows me away how many parents don’t know where their kids are these days. First of all, friends are important, but it’s the family that sticks around for the long haul. Parents should not feel embarrassed to require their kids to be home for dinner and to know their whereabouts. And no, I don’t drop my kids off at the mall. What good things happen at the mall anyway? Involve them in church youth groups and volunteer organizations and sports, but be careful how much time they spend wandering aimlessly with friends who might not always be the best influence. Don’t let them back you in a corner. It’s okay to put your foot down and say no on some of their activities. As long as they know you love and respect them, they will eventually understand ( it might be when they’re 30, but they will thank you later).

8. Ignoring the value of hard work. Do your kids do regular chores? If not, why not? You are robbing them of valuable opportunities that will raise their self-esteem and help them learn skills they will use all their life. Aside from that, they live in your house, and you are not a maid. Enough said.

9. Not teaching them manners. The other day, two teenage boys walked into a door in front of me and let the door swing back in my face. They just kept talking and didn’t even look back. I can hold a door open myself just fine, but I think it’s a good thing to teach teen boys and girls to look out for the person behind them. Teach them to say excuse me when they bump into someone or walk in front of them. Kids today could really use a lesson in manners. You will do the world a lot of good to teach them to respect and honor others like our faith teaches.

10. Money doesn’t grow on trees. One day, they will be on their own and will need to know how to pay bills. Teach them at an early age that doing work is how they get money. Have them do jobs to earn their spending money. Teach them to tithe 10% to charity, like the Bible teaches, and show them how to invest. Proverbs has a lot of great verses to show kids the importance of being wise with finances and planning ahead. There is a time to give money to kids, but be careful. Many kids are getting money way too easily, without understanding its value.

There isn’t a blueprint out there for how to raise morally aware kids, in an increasingly immoral world. But there is hope. We have more power than we realize.

Remembering that we have the church to guide us, and Orthodox Christian friends and family who are going through the same thing, helps.

It’s so important that we do the hard things sometimes, and step up to the plate. Our kids need us to be strong and guide them to the right thing.

By Christina Pessemier in The Sounding Blog

Source: http://myocn.net/10-ways-orthodox-parents-set-children-up-for-moral-failure/

The bringing of the relics of St. Nicholas the Wonderworker from Italy to Russia triggered much discussion about the veneration of holy relics and particularly about the propriety of their fragmentation. We gathered some most common questions of our readers and addressed them to Archpriest Vladislav Tsypin, a professor, a doctor of Church history and a lecturer of the canon law in Moscow Theological Academy and Moscow Theological Seminary.

- Fr. Vladislav, while the veneration of holy relics do not cause any questions in the Orthodox environment, the tradition of their fragmentation can seem strange to some people. Does it not contradict the Orthodox dogmatics?

- It does not contradict at all. In the Ancient Church, at the time of persecutions, there was a tradition of serving the Liturgy on the relics of martyrs. When the number of churches began to increase after the Milan edict of Emperor Constantine, it led to the tradition of the relics' fragmentation, so that in every church people could serve the Liturgy on the relics. On the other hand, it also led to the fact that people began to use for that not only the relics of martyrs, but of other saints too. On its turn, it led to the appearance of antimensions, which have the signature of the bishop and consequently serve as a "document" which proves that a priest serves the Liturgy not by his own will, but by the will of the bishop. By the way, according to the canon law, a bishop is allowed to serve the Liturgy even without an antimensions, if it is necessary.

Archpriest Vladislav Tsypin

- Does the size of the relics’ particle, which you want to venerate, matter?

- The size itself does not matter. However, psychological perception of people can be different, when they see the whole relics or just a part of them. God acts it the way known to Him only. And this way is called God’s grace. According to the decision of the 7^th Ecumenical Council, relics are honored on an equal basis with icons. The way God’s grace works through them is similar to the way it works through icons. When we appeal to the saints’ relics, it is more important that we believe in the power of God’s grace and the holiness of the saint. It means that our conscious faith matters.

- Why was it so that many saints asked their disciples and even ordered them to let the animals eat their bodies or just leave them in a forest? Why did they want that their burial sites remained unknown?

- The saints who asked for that did that because of their great humility. They considered themselves the worst people. Here we can observe a "typical" Christian paradox: the best of us, Christians, pay attention to their sins, but not to their merits. They were those "of whom the world was not worthy", as Apostle Paul said.

- Then why was it so that in most cases that order was not followed in Christianity?

- First of all, their disciples fulfilled the usual duty of burying their close people. It is natural even from the secular point of view. Secondly, in most cases the disciples and the followers of saints preserved their relics to glorify the Lord for granting them such a person and to show future generations the example of following Christ.

- In the life story of St. Demetrius of Thessaloniki, it is said that he was against the fragmentation of his relics. Once Leontius, an Illyrian nobleman, wanted to take a part of the saint’s relics to build a church in St. Demetrius’ honor in his homeland. Another time the ambassadors of Emperor Justinian, who wanted to get the relics of St. Demetrius to bless the newly built church in honor of St. Sophia, were stopped by the pillar of fire from which they heard the voice: "Stop and do not dare to do this". What can we say about this case?

- In the life stories of saints, there are various episodes, but not always and not in all circumstances they can be enlightening for us, Christians. There can be found different miraculous things, which perhaps should serve as an example, but only in case we clearly understand the context of the events and the spiritual condition of the people who got involved in this or that situation. This is why something what we know from the life story of a particular saint cannot become a rule which must be observed. As for the will of St. Demetrius saying that he did not want his relics to be divided anymore, we should consider that this practice could turn into misuse: perhaps, there was a danger of destroying the relics at all. It became also a spiritual danger for Christians, freedom from which is recalled in the akathists to the saint.

- Are there any statements concerning relics in the canons of the Orthodox Church?

- There are. In the rule 94 of the Carthage council, devoted to the churches constructed without permission of the authorities, it is said that local bishops are prescribed to destroy such churches if there are no body or parts of the relics of a saint in them. Here we can see that the parts of relics are compared by their value to the bodies of martyrs. What is more, no one doubted that the particles of relics could be honored on the equal basis with the whole relics.

- What is the origin of the tradition of relics’ fragmentation?

- Perhaps the tradition appeared because of the fact that the relics of many saints were divided from the very beginning: the saints were executed, their remains were burnt – only their bones remained. What is more, there was a need for holy relics for antimensions, which made this practice unavoidable, because it was just impossible to have the whole relics for each from the hundreds of thousands of churches.

Many relics, for example, the relics of St. Savva of Serbia, were destroyed. Some relics disappeared, while others were just stolen – especially after the 4^th Crusade, the Ottoman conquests and so on. However, we cannot stop honoring a saint only because his relics have disappeared. In my opinion, destruction and disappearance of holy relics should be considered the consequence of our unworthy behavior.

We need to keep in mind one thing: quite often we can see only the outer side of what is going on in the Church and the world. The heavenly sense of the ongoing events is not always clear to us. Perhaps, we act very self-confidently when we ty to understand the deep meaning and the sense of what is happening.

- You are talking about a prudent and Christian approach to the actions of saints: not in every situation a particular reaction of a saint, about which we read in his life story (or in a legend about him), should become a general rule.

- That is right. One must not turn a particular case into a general obligatory rule. Any action must be authorized by the Church to become a universal rule. We have no right to refer to certain episodes from the saints’ lives and base certain rules on their reactions, without paying attention to all the circumstances which led a holy (I stress!) person to this or that reaction. For example, we have no right to refer to the episode in which St. Nicholas slapped heretic Arius during the 1^st Ecumenical Council and consider this episode a permission to beat anyone who does not agree with us, no matter whether they are people of the same faith or not. You will agree that it will be strange to make this a norm. There were so many cases when it seemed as if a slap was given because of “pious zeal”, but in fact those were just the examples of bad behavior, which had nothing in common with righteousness.

- What is the difference between Christian and pagan approach to the worship of relics?

- There is a wide range of different pagan beliefs. For example, the Romans had nothing similar to the worship of remains. In ancient Egypt people artificially made mummys and tried to connect that with their specific belief in immortality.

As for the difference between Christian and pagan worshipping, we need to remember the same rule which is applied to the worship of holy icons: we worship the foretype, which means we glorify God the Creator, Who gives His creation freedom and strength to follow Him. At the same time, we honor the feat of those people, who have managed to fully use their freedom, and ask them to help us in our prayer for strength we need to come to Christ and be true Christians.

An interview with Fr. Vladislav Tsypin

Translated From Source: http://www.pravoslavie.ru/103681.html

The classic image of the Christian as an athlete of Christ is a little overplayed nowadays, in a culture obsessed with sports. I personally like very much this metaphor, but if we push it too much, we may end up with a very simplistic view, as the priests become coaches, the church an arena, the church community a team and so on. We can get lost in sports metaphors and loose the genuine significance of our Christian life.

What we do in Christ is beyond a sport, beyond a mere entertaining game. It’s about real life. For me, a true athlete is someone closer to the soldier that ran the first marathon, who did not complete an eight-week program of gradual endurance build-up, nor run it to overcome a midlife crisis. But he ran with a purpose, as he was asked to, and gave up all he had to give to fulfill the mission for his country.

I am not saying that there are no similarities between sports and our life in Christ. There are many, and I have used such metaphors in sermons and catechism before. We need, however, to make a distinction between the two. Let me be blunt: our life in Christ is not a sport. The Greeks have a great word to describe our life in Christ: askesis. Askesis could be translated as exercise, but not for fun, not to stay fit, not to pass time, but as a purposeful exercise that builds us out of this world and prepares us for the Kingdom. Askesis is also not only for the monastics, for the hermit living in the lost caves of the earth, but askesis is for everyone that is serious about being saved.

The Work of the Faith

To me however, probably the most appropriate translation of askesis, would be “struggle”. The first marathoner, in his supra-human effort of self-denial, gave up his life to fulfill his mission. In the same way, askesis is an exercise of renunciation to the world for a greater purpose: we give up a Sunday morning sleep-in for a Divine Liturgy, a burger for a day of fasting, a party on a Saturday night for a Vesper service, our favorite song in the car for a few minutes of the Jesus prayer. And we can go on. Struggle means to give up the “fluff” and concentrate on the things that matter. Anyone can do that. You don’t need monastic vows to show up in time for services or resist a meat craving.

But the struggle does not stop here. The above are the “easy” things. The struggle also involves fighting against our inner sinful urges as each one of us deals with internal turmoil. Some struggle with alcohol, other with drugs, others with sexual temptations, others with envy, or pride, or gossip or depression. On a smaller or a larger scale, we all have to face these tendencies. Their nature is different in each one of us, but the struggle is common to all.

The current trends in the culture tell us to let go of the struggle, that we are defined by our inner predispositions, and we should accept them as part of who we are. Christianity, and particularly Orthodoxy, says the opposite. We are not defined by our sinful desires, but we are defined by the purpose of our creation, which is union with Christ. Our true nature is fully revealed in Christ, the new Adam, and our struggle is to grow more into what He is. This is not an easy task and probably you know it already.

The sinful desires are to be rejected, are to be chased away from our lives and replaced with what is beneficial for our ultimate purpose. Therefore, the life of the Christian is against the world, not to condemn it, but to transform it into a better place, starting with one’s self. The transformation of man into Christ should transform and lift the fallen world. The fallen world should not pressure down man to its fallen level.

The Treasure of Finishing the Race

Keeping up this fight is hard and many times requires a great deal of sacrifice. Not all choices made for Christ are easy, but neither is the easy way out a good choice. Along the path of struggle we fall many times, but in Christ we rise and we continue to run, walk or even crawl. We bite our lips, and we keep moving ahead, never stopping. It is not our sinful tendencies that define us, but our ability to transform them in opportunities of growth and our perseverance to rise after every fall.

Struggle may also mean learning to accept the things in our lives that are not in our control: pain, suffering, loss. These are all part of the fallen world in which we operate. There is no way to avoid them, and the Christian struggle helps us be better prepared when they strike. By living a purposeful life towards the kingdom, we understand that any earthly suffering is temporary in nature. And the healing of the soul will eventually lead to a complete refashioning of man: body and soul. Living in the Communion of the Church, of the living and of the departed together, we learn that any separation is transitory, and the Reunion we wait for will bring great joy to those who have gone through the pains of separation. The Christian self-denial shows that every material loss is a gain, as we learn more and more to give up what is earthly and gather what is heavenly.

What is in our control however is to keep up the struggle no matter what. A life without struggle is a life not worth living, as it would be nothing else but a capitulation to slothfulness, sinfulness and decay. Life is a struggle, and the struggle is life. There is no way around it. We should accept it, embrace it and use it for our final benefit. It will be with us all our lives, only ending with our entrance in the Kingdom. So let’s get to “work-out” our salvation through struggle, not with sadness, but with joy and complete trust in the Lord, Who struggled Himself for our salvation, showing us first the way to conquer the Kingdom! Amen!

Source: http://myocn.net/christian-athletics-struggle-for-the-kingdom/

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