The Catalog of Good Deeds

Icon inscriptions are symbols and acronyms accepted in the Russian Orthodox icon-painting tradition. Inscriptions can be made both in Church Slavonic and in Greek language. In these inscriptions, contracture is widely used (from lat. “shrinking”), which is writing a reduced form of a word with the help of its first and last letters. Above such words, a special symbol called titlo ( ҃ ) is written.

The reduced form of the name Jesus Christ, consisting of two pairs of letters is IC XC. The cruciform halo reminds us about the Savior’s death on the Cross, the redemptive effect of which covered the whole world – “it is crosswise, for with the Cross He saved the world”. Number “four” is the symbol of spatial fullness. Four “ends”, which make a cross, connect four cardinal points.

In three visible sides of the cross within the halo, the Greek word O Ѡ N is written, which means “I AM”. That manner appeared in the 11^th century. This inscription highlights the Divine nature of Jesus Christ in accordance with the revelation Moses got from the bush: “I am Who I am” (Exodus 3:14).

In Russian icon-painting tradition, Greek letter Ѡ (omega) is replaced by Ѿ (ot).

On Greek and Bulgarian icons, letter O (omicron) is placed on the left, Ѡ (omega) - in the top, N (nu) – on the right. The whole inscription is read in a circle from left to right.

For Russian icons a different order is more common: Ѡ (o) or Ѿ (ot) is on the left, Ѻ (on) in in the top, Н (nash) is on the right. The inscription is read by lines beginning from the top and then from left to right in the second line.

It must be noted that the biblical explanation of the words was not the only one in ancient Rus. From the old-rite literature, we can learn that there was another explanation. Perhaps, it was naïve to some extent, but still it did not violate any dogmatic rules of the Church. According to it, three letters expressed first of all three natures of God. Secondly, the Divine nature of Jesus Christ: Ѿ (ot) – “fatherly”. Ѻ (on) – “oum", Н (nash) – “inconceivable Son”. Thirdly, the incarnation of the Son of God and His sufferings: Ѿ (ot) – “from Heaven He came”, Ѻ (on) – “they who did not conceive Me”, Н (nash) – “crucified on the Cross”.

As can be seen from these explanations, the order of reading the symbols was also not unified and could be changed, tearing apart any connections with the Greek tradition and replacing the words “I AM” with the word Ѿ Ѻ Н .

Inscriptions on icons

The inscriptions on ancient icons were quite simple. Some widely-known words were reduced. Apart from Ιησους Χρηστος, such words as Αρχαγγελος, ο Δικαιος, ο Προφητης, ο Αγιος и η Αγια could also be written in their short forms.

The names were supposed to be legible. However, if we speak about St. Johns (Forerunner, Chrysostom). We should point out that often both their names and titles (ο Προδρομος, ο Χρυσοστομος) were shortened.

Greek	Church Slavonic	Translation
Θεος	Бгъ	God
–	Гдъ	The Lord
ΙΣ ΧΣ	IС ХС, IИС ХС, IСЪ ХСЪ	Ιησουσ Χριστος, Jesus Christ
ΙΧΘYΣ	–	Literally “fish”, an ancient acronym for Jesus Christ, the Son of God, the Savior
–	Црь слвы	The King of Glory
ΜΠ ΘY	МН БЖН	Greek: short for Μητερ Θεου Church Slavonic: the Mother of God
–	1. Б. М. 2. БЦА 3. П. Б.	1. Mother of God 2. Theotokos 3. Holy Theotokos
–	I. Н. Ц. I	Jesus of Nazareth King of the Jews
ΤΚΠΓ	МЛ РБ	Greek: short for Τουτο Κρανιον Παραδεισος Γεγονε Church Slavonic: short for Calvary, the place of execution
–	ГГ	Mount Golgotha, the inscription at the bottom of the Cross
–	ГА	Adam’s head, the inscription near the skull of Adam at the bottom of the Cross
–	К	Lance – one of the weapons of passions, depicted near the Cross
–	Т	Cane – one of the weapons of passions, depicted near the Cross
–	КТ	Short for Lance and Cane – the weapons of passions
ΑΓΙΟΣ,αγιος	АГИOС, СВЯТЫЙ, СТЫ, СТН,СТИ, СТ, СВ	Saint
ΑΓΙΑ, αγια	АГИА, СТАЯ	Saint (women)
ΟΚΑ, ΟΑΚ	–	Righteous
–	ПРO	Prophet
–	АПЛЪ	Apostle
–	СТЛЬ	Hierarch (bishop saint)
–	МЧ, МЧНК	Martyr
–	ПР	Venerable

Examples and types of inscriptions

Jesus Christ, Pskov, 15th century

Jesus Christ, Greece, 16th century

Jesus Christ, Rus, 16th century

Mother of God, Byzantium, 14th century

Mother of God, Rus, 16th century

Mother of God, Serbia, 14th century

Archangel, Byzantium, 12th century

Archangel, Greece, 16th century

Prophet, Greece, 16th century

Prophet, Rus, 15th century

Saint, Bulgaria, 14th century

Saint, Serbia, 14th century

Saint, Rus, 17th century

Saint, Rus, 12th-13th centuries

Saint, Greece, 16th century

Apostle, Rus, 16th century

Apostle, Rus, 17th century

Martyr, Rus, 16th century

Martyr, Rus, 17th century

John, Rus, 15th century

John, Greece, 16th century

John, Rus, 16th century

Forerunner, Greece, 16th century

Forerunner, Rus, 16th century

Chrysostom, Byzantium, 11th century

Chrysostom, Greece, 16th century

Translated from: https://azbyka.ru/nadpisi-na-ikonax

Many things in life come in stages, and fatherhood is one of them. My life as a father began in 1996 with the birth of our first child, Tatiana. The day she came into the world was one of the most glorious days of my life. I experienced a feeling that I never had before, and I gained a perspective that had been absent from my life until that point. I had read about the love of God the Father for His children, but now I was experiencing it firsthand.

Realizing that we are given the gift to co-create with God is extremely humbling. For some, however, and for reasons not always known, fatherhood comes through adoption - the opportunity to offer a child the same care and love as a biological father. The truth is, fatherhood is not simply about having a child; it’s about raising a child in a loving relationship.

A Time to Reflect

For some fathers, there comes a time when they begin to assess their own parenting skills, often comparing themselves to their dads. They also begin to compare and contrast themselves to other fathers. They might reflect on their own childhoods. Some fathers reflect on the wonderful qualities of their dads and strive to imitate them. Others remember how tough it was and promise to never be like their fathers.

As I reflect on my relationship with my dad, I realize there are things that I admire and want to emulate. He was a hard worker, committed to providing for his family and dedicated to seeing that his three children received a good education. Conversely, there are other things that I’ve worked hard to im- prove upon. Ideally, as dads we are working to do a little bit better than our fathers, and we hope that our sons will do a little bit better than us. With the grace of God, each generation will improve upon the previous one.

A Time of Doubt

My experience over the years as a priest, a marriage and family therapist and a parenting coach is that many fathers doubt their parenting effectiveness from time to time. And one particular father comes to mind.

With tears in his eyes he told me, “I’m not a good father. I don’t feel I’m doing a good job. I’m not home that much. I’m impatient with my kids, and I don’t feel like I connect with them.” Emotionally, this man was broken. He shared with me that his father wasn’t a very good example, and consequently, he wasn’t able to give to his kids what he himself never received as a child.

It was obvious this dad was struggling and dealing with a lot of guilt. I challenged him and asked,

“Do you feel you’re doing a little bit better of a job than your dad?”

“For sure!” He replied.

“Do you think you can improve a little more?”

“Yes, but I need help.”

We talked about some simple ways to connect more deeply and communicate more effectively and patiently with his children and how to apply them to improve his relationship with them.

As we continued to meet week after week, his doubts and concerns over not being “good enough” slowly began to fade. He began developing confidence in his parenting skills, especially upon seeing positive results. As he made sure to be home each night for dinner, read to his children at bedtime and play with them, the children responded by soaking up all that he was able to offer them.

A strong desire to grow as a parent and learn practical parenting and child development skills, and - most of all - asking God to help him love more deeply were the winning ingredients for this father who wanted to change in order to have a better relationship with his kids.

Four Ways To Connect More Deeply With Our Children:

1) Spend more time together: This can mean talking, playing, laughing, dancing, whatever! Just spend more time eye-to-eye and heart-to-heart.

2) Really listen to them: Often as parents, when we “listen” to our children we aren’t actually listening, but rather we are planning our response. Listening requires us to be fully present with our minds and hearts, trying to understand our children’s world.

3) Discipline rather than punish: The word “disci- pline” shares its root with the word “disciple” - one who is a student or pupil. We should look at our children as learners. This doesn’t mean we don’t set clear consequences, but all behavior challenges should be considered opportunities for our children’s growth and our own growth as fathers.

4) Pray for them: “You don’t need to say a lot to children. Words hammer at the ears, but prayer goes to the heart. Prayer is required, with faith and without anxiety, along with a good example.” – St. Porphyrios

A Time of Growth

Nobody is born with all the skills needed to win a Father of the Year award. We grow into the role through intentional efforts.

For some men, it may seem more natural to parent effectively because they had great fathers or father figures who gave them wonderful examples.

Others had completely different experiences, growing up in homes where their dads were abusive, home but not actually present or absent altogether. Still, I’ve met men who were raised in diminished home environments, and yet they have become excellent fathers because they were intent on being good fathers.

When a man is from a home where there was minimal healthy emotional connection, one of the most important ele- ments for healing and growth to occur is to identify the road- blocks that he created to emotionally protect himself and that are now preventing healthy interpersonal relationships from developing. Such roadblocks develop over time during younger years in order to cope with the painful relational experiences.

A man who grows up in a home where the father is disconnected, abusive or physically absent is left wounded, and, to be sure, the wound just doesn’t disappear over time. Similarly, when a man becomes a father himself, if he hasn’t identified those wounds and worked through the pain of those experiences, he will parent from that wounded state.

It’s important to recognize that we don’t want to parent or relate to others in life out of our unresolved pain but from a heart that is healed and enlarged by the grace of God.

It’s important to recognize that we don’t want to parent or relate to others in life out of our unresolved pain but from a heart that is healed and enlarged by the grace of God. One father once told me, “I had no idea that raising chil- dren would bring so much stuff up in me, but I’m grateful because I could never heal from a wound I didn’t know existed. I never thought having kids would lead to my own healing and help me grow into being a better father.”

Healing Old Wounds

Wounds from childhood can impact our parenting and our lives in general. Our instinct might be to pre- tend they don’t exist, but this can cause greater issues internally and in our relationships. It is important to seek help to try and tend to these wounds. Begin with prayer and reach out to a priest for guidance. If more counsel is needed, see if your parish priest can refer you to a counselor in your area to help you navigate the process. “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me” (Psalm 50:12).

A Time of Thanksgiving

It’s easy to be thankful when we feel blessed and when we experience good things in life. It’s difficult, however, to have the same depth of gratitude when we experience challenges. We’re not adept at glorifying God when we’re suffering.

Even though God has given us the example of Job, we still find it hard connecting the mercy and love of God with our suffering. We have a difficult time seeing anything positive in suf- fering. Job, however, never separated the mercy and justice of God from his misfortunes. He gave thanks to God and didn’t waver in his faith and was able to give thanks to God through the duration of his suffering. I say this because there are many opportunities for us as fathers to convert what we believe to be difficult or doubtful times into something that God is allowing for the purpose of our own healing and growth. Fatherhood is filled with them. Though we see ourselves as givers, providing for our children, we are more often the recipients of God’s grace if we care to notice. I can say without hesitation that I have learned more from my children than what I’ve taught them over the years.

After twenty-one years of being a father, I still find myself doing all that I’ve written about. I continue to experience joy and wonder, reflect on my own parenting, reflect on how I was parented by my dad, doubt my effectiveness and grow as God works on me through my children. The stages of fatherhood for me have not been linear as much as they’ve been cyclical. As I stand back and look at my role as a father, and as you look at yours, I hope that we will all be able to say, “By the grace of God, I’m doing just a little bit better than my father, and with God’s help, our children will do a little bit better than us.”

By Rev. Fr. Timothy Pavlatos

Source: https://www.goarch.org/-/fatherhood-a-time-of-joy-and-wonder

The Dispassion of a Stone

Abba Ammon went to Abba Anthony one day. They had a conversation about soul-nurturing things. Abba Anthony predicted to Abba Ammon after the conversation that the latter will succeed in the fear of God.

Upon uttering that prophecy, Anthony led Ammon out of his cell and pointed at a rock, saying:

– Insult this rock and hit it hard.

Ammon did it.

Abba Anthony asked him:

– Did the rock react in any way? Did it fight back?

Ammon replied:

– No, it didn’t.

– You will achieve the same level of dispassion, too, - Abba Anthony said.

Abba Anthony’s prophecy was made true eventually.

Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering (Col.3:12)

God Knows What Is Good

A brother asked his elder:

– Is there a specific good action that I can keep doing for a lifetime?

The elder replied:

– God knows what is good. I heard an elder ask Abba Nestorius, “What good shall I do?” The abba responded, “Aren’t all good actions equal? The Scripture says, “Abraham was hospitable, and God was with him; Elijah loved silence, and God was with him; David was meek, and God was with him.” Therefore, learn what your soul desires to do for God’s sake, and do it, paying attention to your heart.”

And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what [is] the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to [the will of] God.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to [his] purpose (Romans 8:27–28).

Clay Pots

A monk came to his spiritual counselor and complained:

– Father, I come to you time and time again. I repent of my sins, and I seek your advice. In spite of that, I cannot improve. What’s the reason for me to come to you then? I keep falling in the same sins after talking with you.

The abba replied:

– My son, take two pots, fill one of them with honey and leave the other empty.

The disciple did as his master requested.

– Now, – the master continued, – pour the honey from the first pot into the second pot several times.

The disciple obeyed.

– Now look at the empty pot and smell it, sonny.

The disciple looked at the pot and smelled it. He concluded:

– Father, the empty pot smells honey, and there’s some honey left inside.

– That’s precisely how, – the elder said, – my teachings remain in your soul. If you gain at least some virtue for Christ’s sake, the Lord in his mercy will add up to it and save your soul for the paradise. A cook doesn’t put pepper inside the pot that smells honey. Similarly, God will not reject you if you preserve at least some righteousness inside your heart.

But to him that worketh not, but believeth on him that justifieth the ungodly, his faith is counted for righteousness (Romans 4:5)

Repentance: How Long Should It Take?

A brother asked Abba Poemen, “I committed a terrible sin and I would like to spend three years in repentance for it.”

“It’s too long,” Abba Poemen said. “What about one year?” the brother inquired. “That’s too long,” the elder repeated. The elder’s disciples who witnessed their dialog, asked, “Will a forty days long repentance be enough?” The elder answered, “It’s too much. If a person repents wholeheartedly and stops sinning from then on, God will accept him in just three days.”

Repent, and turn yourselves from all your transgressions; so iniquity shall not be your ruin (Ezekiel 18:30)

A Greater Challenge

There was a hermit who achieved such holiness that he could easily live with wild beasts, and they did not attack him. He would feed their cubs, and the wild animals did not harm him. One of the monks who lived in a monastery saw him and said:

– If you want to be even more perfect, come to our monastery and try to avoid conflicts with the holy brethren.

O all ye beasts and cattle, bless the Lord: praise and exalt him above all for ever (Daniel 3:81)

Who Are You, a Gentleman or a Pauper?

There were some monks who were discussing humility. A noble man from Gaza heard them say that the closer one gets to God, the more sinful he considers himself to be. He was amazed:

— How can that be?

He was eager to know what these words meant.

One of the monks replied:

— Sir, who do you think you are in your town?

The noble man answered:

— I think I am the greatest and the most important man in my town.

— What if you go to Caesarea, what would you think of yourself?

— I would consider myself to be the last of the gentry.

— Who would you be in Antioch then?

— I'd be counted among the commoners.

— What if you go to Constantinople to the Emperor's Court, who would you be?

— I’d consider myself a tramp.

— This is how saints look at it. — the monk said, — the closer they get to God, the more sinful they feel. When Abraham saw the Lord, he called himself dirt and ashes.

. . . Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord, which am but dust and ashes (Genesis 18:27)

Use It Right Now!

– Father! - a newly-tonsured monk addressed the abbot. – My heart is filled with love and free from temptations. What do I do next?

The abbot invited the disciple to visit a terminally ill man who had requested a confession. Upon comforting the grieving family, the abbot pointed at a box which stood in a corner of the room.

– What is there in that box? – he asked.

– It is full of clothes that my uncle never wore, – the dying man’s niece replied. – He was always thinking that he would wear those clothes on a special occasion. As a result, they are rotting in that box.

– Remember the box, – the abbot taught his disciple after they left the house. – If there are treasures in your heart, use them right now, or else they will perish.

Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof (Matthew 6:34)

SOURCE

The traditional acts of asceticism associated with Great Lent (and the whole of the Christian life) are prayer, fasting, almsgiving, and repentance. In my experience, Orthodox faithful tend to concentrate on fasting and perhaps making a good confession. If we have weaknesses, they are found in our prayers and almsgiving. These two belong together. Christ said:

And I say to you, make friends for yourselves by unrighteous mammon, that when you fail, they may receive you into an everlasting home. (Lk. 16:9)

For many, this saying seems extremely obscure. Who are these friends who will receive us? They are the poor. Like Lazarus in the parable, they will rest in Abraham’s bosom. The rich man called out for help but found none. Christ suggests here, that had the rich man “made friends” with Lazarus by acts of mercy, kindness, and generosity, he would have found ready help and a path from Hades to Paradise.

If you want to strengthen your prayers, make friends of the poor. This story is a great illustration:

During the reign of Alexander I, a certain nobleman fell into disgrace with the Tsar. His wife asked Father Nazarius [Abbot of Valaam Monastery] to pray that her husband’s case would turn out well. “Very well,” the Elder replied, “but first we must ask those close to the Tsar for their help.”

“We have done that already,” she answered, “but there is little hope.”

“But you have not asked those who needed to be asked,” said Father Nazarius. “Give me some money, and I will ask those whom I know.”

The woman gave him five pieces of gold. “No,” he said, “these are no good. Don’t you have small change made of copper or silver?” Father Nazarius took the money and during the day he gave it away to the poor and the unfortunate. He returned to the woman’s home toward evening.

“Glory to God,” he said, “those close to the Tsar have promised to help you. After this came word of the successful outcome of the dignitary’s case. The man and his wife rejoiced, and wanted to know exactly who had helped him with the Tsar. They were astonished when the Elder told them that it was the poor, those who are close to the Heavenly King. Deeply touched by the Elder’s piety, they maintained their great respect and love for him until the end.

Through Christ let us continually offer to God the sacrifice of praise, that is, the fruit of lips that acknowledge his Name. Do not forget to do good and to share; for with such sacrifices God is well pleased. Hebrews 13:15-16

By Fr. Stephen Freeman

Source: https://blogs.ancientfaith.com/glory2godforallthings/2018/02/09/strengthen-lenten-prayer-life/

It’s Sunday morning. The Church bulletin says that Church starts at 10:00am. It’s now 10:30am. You’re walking to the car to take yourself and the kids to Church. You’re arriving at communion. You’re embarrassed to come in that late, but you’re less embarrassed (after all, half the parish comes to Church late) than you would be by your children’s behavior if you stayed for the whole service.

You walk in during the Lord’s Prayer. A few minutes later, thank God, communion. Now you can go. Lunchtime!

Whining, crying, screaming, playing, talking, jumping, falling, bumping heads, chattering, running (or trying to)… I don’t know about you, but these are all things I’m afraid my two and a half year old son, John, is going to do in Church. But every week, multiple people in the Church tell me how well behaved he is. And with the exception of a cry here and a bump there, he is, by God’s grace, really well behaved in Church. Not only is he well behaved, he pays attention and participates! And no, we don’t arrive at communion. We arrive at or around the Doxology and we stay through coffee hour. Our Divine Liturgy begins at 9:30am and ends around 11:30am. He spends a solid two hours in Church without leaving.

To add a little more perspective to this great miracle, I’m a presbytera, so for all intents and purposes, I’m a single parent on Sundays. And John is extremely active, even for a two year old.

So how do I do it, you ask? No, there is no magic that comes upon a priest’s child that makes them better behaved. In fact, I’ve known lots of PKs that are quite badly behaved…

Here’s my take on bringing children to Church: How is a child ever going to learn to behave in Church if they aren’t in Church? How can we expect our children to prioritize Church if we don’t? What does it say to our children that we are on time for everything- school, work, movies, soccer practice, baseball games, concerts, luncheons- but we are NEVER on time for Church (except for Pascha- gotta get a good seat!)? What message does this send? Children pick up on these things. It is this quiet, childlike observance and understanding that I rely on to help me keep him calm and engaged during Church services.

John and I talk about Church a lot. At most, we go to Church three times a week (that’s during special seasons or occasions), but usually just on Sunday mornings like everyone else. Compare this with daycare or school every day, and kids can easily forget from one Sunday to the next. So that’s tip number one. Talk to your child about Church as often as you can. Liken things to Church. Make Church sound fun and exciting. For kids, it can be fun and exciting. John loves Church because there is SO MUCH to look at, listen to, and do. Keep Church in the forefront of their minds.

Don’t just talk about Church outside of Church, however, talk about Church INSIDE Church (quietly, of course). Explain what’s going on to your child as it happens. Give them the ol’ play by play. If you don’t know what’s going on, educate yourself ahead of time. Most Divine Liturgy books have some sort of explanation in them about the service, borrow one from the parish and read it.

One of the biggest weapons I have in my arsenal of good-behavior-inducing techniques is where we sit in Church. We sit up front. In the front row. For every service. This is for two reasons. Imagine being a child about three or four feet tall. How boring would Church be if all you could see was the rear end of the papou sitting in front of you? Granted, he’s a nice papou who likes to make you laugh, but seriously. You may as well be listening to a cd! When we sit in the front row, John can see everything!

And the nice papous and yiayias are reason number two that we sit in the front row. Sitting up front minimizes the distractions. He’s not distracted by people coming and going. He’s not distracted by people to whom he’d like to go say hello. He’s not distracted by 500 people trying to make him laugh. As long as he faces the front of the Church, all there is for him to see is what he should be paying attention to- the service.

The Divine Liturgy, in Greek, is known as “I Theia Litourgia”, which means “the work of the people pertaining to God.” Work of the people. Does that we should be doing something? Indeed, we should. And so this is the primary way that I keep John behaving well- by engaging and involving him in the service. When the priest blesses us, censes us, or bows to us, we bow. When we hear the words “Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,” we do our cross. When we commemorate the Theotokos, we do our cross. When the small and great entrances happen, we do our cross as they walk by and name the chalice, patten, censor, cross, and fans (and even name the alter boys and priests if we can). When the priest tells us what to pray for in the litanies, we say, “Lord, have mercy,” or “Grant this, O Lord.” We say the Nicene Creed and the Lord’s prayer together. We sing along with the choir. There is plenty to do! If worse comes to worse, we point out all the icons and go to the proskinitaria off to the side of the solea and venerate the icon.

Does this mean that John doesn’t have bad days? Of course not! He’s two! He has his moments, sometimes entire services, where he is not so easy to get along with and doesn’t want to pay attention. That’s where mommy’s bag comes in to play (kind of like Mary Poppins’ carpet bag!). The most important thing in Mommy’s bag- our look book. I bought a $3 photo book, in which I put pictures of our family, the priests, the bishop, and little laminated icons (the saints are our family, too!). I change the icons and pictures out every once in a while so that he stays interested.

I also bring some snacks, like Cheerios. Now this may be controversial. Some people say that bringing snacks is not appropriate. But here’s my feeling about it. If he were seven years old, then no, it wouldn’t be appropriate. But toddler-hood is a critical time for children. They are learning about the world around them. Don’t we want them to learn about the world through the Church? They are learning to speak. Don’t we want them to learn the language of the Church (and no, I don’t mean Greek- though learning Greek is all well and good too)? They are learning appropriate behavior. Don’t we want them to learn appropriate Church behavior? I desperately want the Church to be part of his learning experience during this most important time. In which case, I’m willing to compromise a little (like the Church does- oikonomia, right?) and bring a few Cheerios to avoid having to remove him from the service. I also have a few picture books or cars that he likes. And I’ll let him play with them if I have to. But this does not mean that I stop engaging him. I’ll give him a break to play for a few minutes, but then I attempt to get him to put it down and pay attention.

One more thing. Don’t be self-conscious about your child making noise. I have friends who don’t come to Church for more than twenty minutes at a time because they are so afraid of offending someone with their kids’ little chirping and their noises. But those chirping and little noises are how the children talk to God. Those noises are their Divine Liturgy. Don’t deny your child the experience of being in God’s presence because someone doesn’t like that they are trying to sing along with the choir! Of course your child wants to sing! The priest is singing, the chanter is singing, the choir is singing… The children want to sing too!

If someone chastises me for allowing him to make noise and not taking him out, I respond by apologizing for the fact that they were paying attention to John instead of the service. I do it lovingly and tactfully, of course, and then I ask them how he’s supposed to learn to behave in Church from the baby room. I also take a moment to educate them about the fact that in many churches (especially in Greece), there is a lot of movement. People walk all around the Church to venerate the icons, venerate the relics, etc. It is a foreign concept to Holy Orthodoxy which is unique to America that we stand in one place like bumps on a log and don’t make a sound.

And before you say it, yes, I know that a lot of kids cry because they want to leave and when you take them back to the Church they start crying again. This is the other reason I don’t take John out of Church. He doesn’t even know that leaving is an option. If he knew that it were and cried because he wanted to leave Church, then taking him out would be rewarding bad behavior by giving him what he wants. Oh yes, he screams or cries out in Church every once in a while, to be sure. But I only take him out when it’s clear that he won’t stop and we’re bordering on really distracting other people. He knows that if we have to leave because of bad behavior, it is not going to be a fun experience, and we’re going to go right back in to the Church as soon as he’s quiet.

I know, I make it sound easy. Believe me, it’s not. It is really hard work. It takes constant vigilance during Church to keep him engaged. And I’m sure that for the first few weeks, even months, your child will hate it (though they’ll hate it less if you sit in front where they can see!). But don’t give up. They’ll get used to it soon enough, and you will see them begin to love the Church and Her services. And then you will love every minute of worshipping with your child!

Source: http://www.familylifeministry.atlanta.goarch.org/time-to-go-to-church-a-time-to-fear-and-dread/

Subscribe to: Posts ( Atom )

Search This Blog

featured Slider

The Meaning of Various Inscriptions in Orthodox Iconography

Fatherhood: Raising a Child in a Loving Relationship

Seven Parables and Stories for the Week: Issue 24

How to Strengthen Your Acts of Asceticism During Great Lent

How is a child ever going to learn to behave in Church if they aren’t in Church?

Partners